For my new Roses, “Rose Letters” are confessions submitted to raven@ravenrosado.com and posted here anonymously. Come get some things off of your chest. This is a safe space.
1. To avoid being in debt forever, I paid for my education while attending school. It got to be too difficult working a job for pennies and taking 16 credit hours. I quit Chipotle and started a new gig being a naked sushi model. I made like $600 bucks on a bad day and I only did it for a couple of hours on weekends. I told my parents I quit Chipotle to walk dogs.
2. I don’t feel bad for anything I do and nothing makes me nervous. I learned how to act out emotions but I don’t feel them. I apologize for stuff so I don’t have to deal with it. Not because I care.
3. My friend asked me if I am okay with her dating someone I dated for a while in high school. I told her that I didn’t care because we are 25 and that’s old. He treats her so well and is showing a side of himself I’ve never seen. I want him back now. He was mine first though so is that bad?
4. Me and my mama’s friend are friends with benefits. We’ve been since I was 17.
5. I applied to Teach for America cause I heard they help with student loans…but I don’t like kids.
6. I broke up with a guy because he lived in the hood and I was too scared to visit him. His car ended up getting shot up shortly after. That kinda made me not feel so bad because I was right.
7. I used to drop rude customers food on the floor and put it back on their plate and take it out to them and watch them eat it.
8. My dad’s boss is my sugar daddy. We had to pretend we only met once when we all went to his company picnic as a family this past summer.
9. I was 5 weeks pregnant when I went to Miami and drank anyway.
10. I’m not attracted to my boyfriend anymore but I can’t afford to move out. I look at him while he’s sleeping and wish he lived somewhere else.
11. My girlfriends wigs be so bad and her make-up is too much. I get embarrassed bringing her over for family get togethers because I know they laughing at her.
12. I thought about putting Nair in my roommate's conditioner before.
13. Back In the day I smashed a big girl that I named “Fat Prosty”. She was my neighbor. I named her that before I got to know her. Turns out she was pretty cool.
14. I found out my boyfriend wasn’t really going to “the gym”. He was cheating. Instead of confronting him, I found a new place behind his back. I had two weeks until I can move in. So, I decided to do things to fuck with him before it was time for me to leave. One night, he was going to “the gym”. He had his gym bag and everything to make it look “believable”. I passed him his pre-workout. I watched him drink it and leave out. I grinded up laxatives in his pre-workout powder. I know he blew her bathroom the fuck up.

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