When you have a sense of self and you are walking in your purpose, there is just something about you that makes people want to knock you down a few notches. Your anointing annoys people. I remember my sophomore year of high school, I was bringing home 4.0 report cards, getting involved in programs that interested me, and getting into some modeling opportunities. I was happy with myself and the direction my life was going, and it showed. For a few weeks, this girl in my English class could not let a day go by without telling me “You walk funny.” I asked her “How so?”. She curled up her top lip and looked me up and down and said: “I don’t know, you just do.” I told her that maybe she should watch her grades as hard as she watches me and continued on with my day. Weeks went by and I can hear her giggling to her fellow edgeless friends that I walked funny. I didn’t let it bother me but after awhile, I grew a little curious as to what she was talking about.
Weeks went by and I had to inform my teacher that I would not be in class because I had a modeling opportunity that was out of town. She said “Oh! That’s great, I can give you your homework in advance, no problem. Also congratulations, that explains why you walk so confidently.” Y’all, there it was. That “funny walk” was actually confidence. I walked around with my head held high and great posture. That girl saw that and wanted to take that away from me. Had I allowed her to project her insecurities onto me, she would’ve found something else to try to make me feel insecure about. This goes back to my earlier post that not all criticism is constructive. Your purpose, your goals, the bad-ass you’re becoming is not only scary to you, but it is also scary to other people as well.
Sometimes the validation you have within yourself reminds other people of their invalidation. You’re minding your business, drinking water, and starting your business. Then you have this person who is making subtweets about people starting businesses in "over-saturated markets", because you are doing what they were too scared to do. They talk themselves out of making the first step towards their dream every night. Meanwhile, you’re on your third “How to..” course and Amazon already shipped your “How to Effectively Market Your Small Business” book. Not only will people try to invalidate your dream, they will label you with terms like intimidating, superficial, self-centered, or anything with a negative connotation, so that you will slow down your grind. Success is mental and that's where they want to attack you at first. If you want to cripple someone, get into their mind.
Have you been around someone who exudes power? They haven’t mean-mugged nor snapped on anyone but when they walk in the room, you know that they are respected, protected, and on top of their ish? Now you can choose to admire that or feel intimidated by that. If you’re confident in who you are and what you’re doing, you most likely just admire them. You know that you are enough and also worthy of shaking anyone’s hand. That’s why when you walk into an event with upper-echelon people, the most common advice is to behave like you belong there. Someone who is intimidated by confidence, that’s their own personal feelings they need to bring to the altar. That’s not your problem. For those people, looking at someone’s power ignites inside them what they are not confident in. They itch being around people who are happy with themselves because they aren't happy within themselves yet. It's not always an edgeless 16 year old or a coworker, sometimes it's a significant other. That’s why a lot of women who are excelling in their career, have great credit, and property, struggle to date. For many men, they feel like their main job is to provide. They feel like less of a man if they can’t provide or not as well as their significant other. So instead of being honest about that, they say “She’s too intimidating” or even go as far as saying that they have to be with someone who is willing to quit their career to stay at home.
There are many facets to intimidation but let's conclude with this. Someone being intimidated by who you are and what you bring to the table is not your problem. The people who are supposed to be around you are not people who want you to start jogging so that they can catch up. Don’t allow anyone to change your narrative because you know who you are, what you have to offer, what you are capable of, and know that you have something important to say. You are powerful but you are not intimidating. They are just intimidated.
No comments:
Post a Comment