It Ain't Shade if It's The Truth

Some people will wrong you then try to control the way you respond to it. It's one thing for them to be responsible for the disrespect but to try to take the responsibility of choosing how and when you get to heal from it is just as disrespectful.

Example, I speak candidly with you all, (my roses) on here. I've taken you all on a literary journey through my friendships, romantic relationships, and relationships with relatives. Writing is healing. It is how I emote. I leave it all on my paper. Some may not be happy to see what they've done to me on paper which is understandable but also not up to them. I say to those people, when I let your malice get the best of me, you had the control. You don't get to control the healing process too. I owe it to myself to be the captain of my ship.

Many struggle with that, especially fellow creatives. They are afraid to pour their life experiences into their art because of how the perpetrator and their cosigners may take it. I heard Issa Rae say "There's a lot of creativity in brokenness". That rang so true to me because my biggest life lessons when learned, healed me, grew me as a person, as an artist, and has contributed to others lives as well like my readers. Don't rob yourself or the world by silencing yourself for the comfort of others. Don't allow someone to make the way you express your experiences about them. Your intent isn't to hurt or embarrass them. You intend to heal and speak the truth. What you went through wasn't in vain.

When you stand on the truth you are always on the right side. That offense they've taken is merely guilt and embarrassment of how they fell short with you. You're not throwing shade. You are throwing facts. "Why are you being messy and telling our business?" they may scream to control you with guilt. Know that your pain has a purpose and you have every right to healthily express it no matter how uncomfortable that makes them. You could've kept your mouth shut and they also could've done better so, here we are. Dealing with it all in the open instead of tucking it away in the bottom of the basement in the house of pain.