You Are Allowed to Grow

One thing about life is that it’s always going. You are always facing something. As a result, the things you face, the events that happen, and the people you cross paths with, have some sort of impact on you whether you like it or not. Watching a loved-one fall ill may drive you into evaluating how well you’re taking care of your own health. That promotion may test your ability on working under pressure and managing stress. That relationship that failed miserably may bring to light some things you didn’t realize about yourself and also teach you about people and complex personalities. Regardless of what happens in your life, it can change you for the worst or the better. Hopefully, you are learning, healing, and growing. You are allowed to do that, and you do not need anyone to give you the clearance to do so. 

As you mature, you’ll hear comments like “You were just in that messed up relationship last year” or “You just cursed someone out 6 months ago”. People will hold you to past things you’ve done and throw it in your face as if you’re not allowed to learn from your mistakes and apply what you've learned to your life. I don’t care if you were “stupid” over him. You decided to not be stupid forever. What you accepted last year is totally unacceptable and won’t even be considered in this season of your life. Don’t let anyone make you feel like your past mistakes define you forever. Especially don’t allow anyone to make you feel like you are not the person for your purpose. Sometimes we play the fool, go through phases, and face hardships with the destiny of taking what we learned and helping others overcome. I know I personally do not want anyone preaching to me who has never been through anything. Don’t tell me I will overcome if you never overcame anything and have no clue what it even feels like to crawl through the dirt. 

Growth is one of the most beautiful things that life has to offer. However, accountability is a beautiful thing too, let’s not forget it. When I talk about growth, I am not saying don’t take accountability for your actions in the past. I am saying that does not have to be who you are forever. Your story does not have to end that way. You do not have to end as a failure or an imbecile, an angry person, a misguided person, a vindictive person. Give genuine apologies to people, yourself and move on. The biggest and most sincere part of that apology is changed behavior. So, grow and don't you ever stop growing.  Most importantly, don't feel remorseful for choosing your growth.