Mixed Signals Mean "No"

The best way to deal with mixed signals is to not deal with mixed signals at all. Save your time. Believe me, I know that it is easier said than done. When we like someone so much and they are giving us mixed signals, we tend to mainly pay attention to the good parts. "I know he hasn't called in a week but he eventually did and told me Hey beautiful, I missed you. If he didn't want me then he wouldn't have even bothered." Sound familiar?

It is very telling how much of a priority you are to someone by how consistent they are with you. It hurts and it's frustrating but it also makes you wonder "What's the point? Why can't they just leave me alone then?" Well for starters, people who operate on giving mixed signals aren't really that brave. Also, a lot of those people have no regard for other's feelings. As long as they feel good and feel wanted, that's all that matters. Allow me to elaborate.

Mixed signals are essentially soft no's. They lack the bravery to tell you that they don't want to commit to you. Instead, they fall back in hopes that you will get bored, tired of them, or lose feelings for them and break it off. They want to take the easy way out. They are protecting their own feelings more so than yours. They don't want to feel bad or look like a bad person for ending things with you. So, they fade out hoping that you will too. Let's be clear. They may like you and may be attracted to you but not enough to want to fulfill the duties of a romantic partner. It's cowardly and they will string you along for as long as you will allow them to. Someone's eventually going to get tired a break. I suggest you be the one to get tired and walk away. Life is too short to be constantly repeating yourself and begging someone to treat you properly.

It sucks but some people only care about their own feelings. Sometimes the main issue isn't even commitment for them.You are in their life for an ego stroke. You make them feel desirable and comfortable. They made you an outlet. With that being the case, the mixed signals come into play because they are trying to keep you at their convenience. They don't need your love today but after a hard week at work, they may need it Friday. When they need someone to hold, affirm good words onto them, and vent to, they pull you near. When life is going good, and they don't feel lonely, they push you away. You are not a blunt. Your existence wasn't created for you to be their on-call stress reliever. Walk away and walk away with your head held high.

Often times we ask for a sign when we are in this kind of chaos but the mixed signals are a sign within itself. People who want to be in your life do not need a reminder to be present. If someone had some money for you, will you need a reminder to go pick it up? Absolutely not because you want it in your life. People have a sense of urgency for things that they care about. At some point you have to stop making excuses, trying to justify other people's shortcomings and call a spade a spade. It's not even just about your dignity. It's about your sanity. Dropping dead weight is a form of self-care so take care of yourself.