Yeah, when I said I wanted to go on rollercoasters this summer, I meant Six-Flags, not emotional ones. I think it's safe to say that we all have had a little bit too much time to think. As crazy as it's been, maybe it's for the best. Here are some harsh truths that I, along with many of you had to face.
No One is Coming to Save You
It's all on you, homie! People will lend their emotional support but know that it is limited. People have good intentions but they also have their own problems in life to focus on. You have to find your own footing to climb out of that dark hole. No one is going to just pull you out of that job you hate. As much great advice you can collect, no one is going to yank you out of that circle of toxic people. Lastly, no one can heal for you. Your happiness is your responsibility which means, the initiative is yours to take. Don't believe me? Keep waiting. When life hits, it REALLY hits. You'll be okay though. You've been through tough times before. Wipe your face and get started.
You Procrastinate Because You Struggle with Believing in Yourself
You're not lazy, you're just scared. You find yourself busy doing a whole bunch of nothing just to avoid the task you know you need to get done. You've been talking about starting that project for almost a year. You designate time to finally get started and all of a sudden you realize that you need to clean out your closet. Stop it sis, get it done. You don't have to be great to start. You just have to start.
People Are Generally Disappointing
This kind of goes in hand with no one is going to save you. Although everyone deserves a great support system, it might not happen for you. If you do have one, there may come a day when they let you down. That's why your "why" in life cannot be contingent on the support of others. That friend that was so excited to start that business with you turned out to be unreliable. That man you love to the moon and back can't read your love language. You've put up the damn subtitles and he STILL isn't getting it. Your family is annoying you at this moment while you need support more than ever. So what are you going to do? Since everyone around you seems to be falling short are you going to give up on being happy? Do we stop going for the dream? This is why your source of happiness mustn't be reliant on other people. The human species is too unreliable to hold that kind of weight. They may come through but you can't count on them to come through every single time.
Not Everyone is Going to Like You
Jesus himself had haters. No matter how dope you are, not everyone is going to like you. The crazy thing is, it may not even be your fault. You could do absolutely nothing. You would literally hear some of the dumbest reasons as to why. I remember one of my friends was telling me they had to defend my honor to another one of their friends. Apparently, they didn't like me. My friend asked them why and they said: "She looked at me dirty at that party you invited me to." Y'all, the gag is, I didn't even know she was there. I literally did not see her once that night. So yeah, don't waste your time worrying about stuff like that. As long as you move with integrity, how people feel about you is none of your business.
It May Take You a While to Find Love
As you grow older, you look around and see your friends getting married and having children and you can't help but think when is it going to be your turn? The more you focus on that, the harder it is going to be for you to remove yourself from situations that no longer serve you. You feel like you're too old to invest time in people and break up. Although it is important to exercise conflict resolution, it's also okay to come to terms with the fact that y'all aren't it for each other. You can't love someone into valuing you. You cannot force someone to be the one. You will always hit one of the many signs that this isn't right. Loving someone isn't supposed to be so damn hard. When you find the person who is actually for you, they're going to feel like home.
The "Perfect Time" is a Myth
You've been wanting to start that career change, move out of state, write that book, etc for years now. You've been waiting on the "ideal time" as if it's just going to magically appear. The truth is, it is ALWAYS going to be something that comes up that makes you think "maybe I should wait." Sometimes you gotta do things scared. You can't wait to get your ducks in a row. You have to grab what you got and make a run for it because once again, no one is coming to save you. It's up to you.
These are just a few of the many harsh truths that life offers us. What are some harsh truths you had to face? The sooner you acknowledge them, the better. Life happens to all of us but it's up to us to decide what's going to be the impetus to changing things for the better. We don't have to be stuck forever.
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